ok... this is TOTALLY not a new idea that i'm about to talk about. John Gray wrote his book "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" i haven't actually read his book but i got the jist of it.. even flipped through it.
the only reason i mention him is so that no one thinks i came up with this idea all on my own.. i'm just using my own words and tweaking it a bit. but his main idea was that even though men and women use the same words and do the same things.. they mean COMPLETELY different things depending on which sex says or does it.
Theory of Understanding the Sexes
I think it should be understood that we are two completely different species. no if's about it. YES there are some exceptions.. and YES i cannot talk about every single person in this world. but i am talking about the majority here.. i'm sorry.. we can't fight it. we are the result of generations and generations of people who have built our society and our manners and we are the victims of that. so take what i have to say with an open mind. Each view point i give will be given in a language that each sex can understand. so when i use words like bitch or asshole.. it's subject to which sex-language i'm using.. ok? cause each word might mean something else in a different language (the sex's languages, yes.. male and female have different languages)
Understanding the opposite sex:
To the men (written in male-language):
Guys... here is the answer to everything you wanna know. Women are crazy.
Plain and simple. they are emotional, they lackreason in the actions they take.. i'm not bullshitting you. women are CRAZY.. we are all psycho. if you have a girl who blows things outta porportion, in her mind it will seem COMPLETELY logical.. so don't try to argue with her on that point.
if you really wanna know how to deal with women you have to understand that and not argue with their logic. accept it and work around it. i repeat.. do not try to UNDERSTAND why she does certain things or acts a certain way..
cause it will not make sense to you.. if it seems too crazy to be true.. i'm sorrry to say IT IS TRUE... dont' waste time thinking "she can't POSSIBLY be angry about THAT" cause whatever it is.. she is. I'm sorry ladies.. but we are.. Jack Nicholson said it best in his movie when the girl asked him "How do you write women so well?" and he said "I think of a man, and i take away reason and accountability"
To the women(written in female-language):
Ladies... men are asses
that's it. it's the same as with the men trying to understand women..
DON'T try to understand the man. men are emotional like us.. but men don't talk about it. that's just the way they are. if he seems cold and distant.. he IS that cold and distant. if you sit and think.. "nooo.. he can't be THAT mean".. oh no.. he IS.. don't question it. he just doesn't realize it cause our definition of "mean" is different than his.
It's just the way they are. if you wonder why he doesn't react to things like you, it's because they're programmed differently.Different things are seen as important to men, so their priorities are COMPLETELY different. deal with it. don't try to change the man... try to accept that this is what you're gonna get. Men have grown up with the idea that they can't be
emotional, that they have to be calm and collected all the time. so when he acts indifferent to you, don't take it personally, it's a biological thing.
he is NOT like you... if you think he thinks the same way as you but is just hiding it.. NOOO.. he is not. he is built differently. They know exactly what you want outta them.. and could conform to the way you think, but they won't.. simply because.. they are men.
*PLEASE NOTE THIS THEORY TALKS ABOUT THE MAJORITY OF THE SEXES.. BUT NOT ALL MALES AND FEMALES.. JUST, MAJORITY*
Saturday, March 25, 2006
Friday, March 3, 2006
Theory #3 - Theory of Instincts
this one isn't exactly gonna be uplifting...
sigh.. i know i'm gonna get a lot of people disagreeing with me on this one and arguing with me
so let me save you the effort.. this is MY opinion.. i'm just trying to help you, i'm not forcing this idea on you.
Theory of Instincts
In relationships, friends or boy/girl friends.. you always have to use your instincts. we live in world where there are so many liars out there.. fake people, frauds.. it's literally a jungle. fortunately god gave us our instincts, but unfortunately no one uses them enough.
If you feel you're being jerked around by someone, that someone's messing with you. they probably are. don't second guess yourself, you are.. and don't question the queasiness in your stomach or the weight on your chest. I'm not saying that the second you feel someone's lying or playing you that you act on it... instincts have been known to fuck up.. but in the course of the relationship, if the feeling continues, you're being taken for a schmuck. and that's a safe bet.
I'm not being harsh, truth is.. when someone's being honest with you, you never doubt them.. it's so clear and transparent in their actions and intentions. if someone is a jerk.. but is honest about it.. you can TELL.. which actually, some people like me don't mind.
the problem comes with friends, who start playing with you, who keep their true intentions hidden... and we keep giving them the benefit of the doubt, truth is.. we're idiots.
if your'e in a situation that everyone says that someone is playing you, but you don't feel it.. you don't have that queasiness.. have faith in your instincts. i'm not saying be blind, maybe investigate it further.. dont' just give up believing in that person.
but also, vice versa, girls, if you feel a guy is playing you, trying to manipulate you somehow.. he probably is. dont' listen to his iron clad excuses.. that's child's play to them. and boys, if a girl is driving you nuts, and you just can't figure her out and she's getting you confused, she's probably doing it on purpose. and wrapping you around her finger is easy for her.
there IS the rare occasion that it's just a misunderstanding.. if that's the case, then you can easily confront each other and
everything will easily be cleared up......but otherwise.. if you confront each other, and you're still left confused.. or being uneasy.. or just unconvinced.. then your'e being taken for a schmuck if your instincts are wrong, dont' worry.. nothing is forever.. if that friend or boy/girl friend really cares about you.. they'll fight to hang on to you. and that would be enough to remove your uneasiness...
honesty is so amazing.. is so clear.. crystal, i'm not exaggerating! when you hear it from someone.. you'll never doubt it. i know some people say that things could cloud your judgement.. but instinct is not in your brain. it's in your gut.. and THAT can't be clouded. (please dont' reply to me saying .. "your brain controls your gut.. blah blah blah"... stick with my metaphor)
it's a natural tendency to defend ourselves.. ... your body knows best.
i say.. follow your instincts... dont' be fools
sigh.. i know i'm gonna get a lot of people disagreeing with me on this one and arguing with me
so let me save you the effort.. this is MY opinion.. i'm just trying to help you, i'm not forcing this idea on you.
Theory of Instincts
In relationships, friends or boy/girl friends.. you always have to use your instincts. we live in world where there are so many liars out there.. fake people, frauds.. it's literally a jungle. fortunately god gave us our instincts, but unfortunately no one uses them enough.
If you feel you're being jerked around by someone, that someone's messing with you. they probably are. don't second guess yourself, you are.. and don't question the queasiness in your stomach or the weight on your chest. I'm not saying that the second you feel someone's lying or playing you that you act on it... instincts have been known to fuck up.. but in the course of the relationship, if the feeling continues, you're being taken for a schmuck. and that's a safe bet.
I'm not being harsh, truth is.. when someone's being honest with you, you never doubt them.. it's so clear and transparent in their actions and intentions. if someone is a jerk.. but is honest about it.. you can TELL.. which actually, some people like me don't mind.
the problem comes with friends, who start playing with you, who keep their true intentions hidden... and we keep giving them the benefit of the doubt, truth is.. we're idiots.
if your'e in a situation that everyone says that someone is playing you, but you don't feel it.. you don't have that queasiness.. have faith in your instincts. i'm not saying be blind, maybe investigate it further.. dont' just give up believing in that person.
but also, vice versa, girls, if you feel a guy is playing you, trying to manipulate you somehow.. he probably is. dont' listen to his iron clad excuses.. that's child's play to them. and boys, if a girl is driving you nuts, and you just can't figure her out and she's getting you confused, she's probably doing it on purpose. and wrapping you around her finger is easy for her.
there IS the rare occasion that it's just a misunderstanding.. if that's the case, then you can easily confront each other and
everything will easily be cleared up......but otherwise.. if you confront each other, and you're still left confused.. or being uneasy.. or just unconvinced.. then your'e being taken for a schmuck if your instincts are wrong, dont' worry.. nothing is forever.. if that friend or boy/girl friend really cares about you.. they'll fight to hang on to you. and that would be enough to remove your uneasiness...
honesty is so amazing.. is so clear.. crystal, i'm not exaggerating! when you hear it from someone.. you'll never doubt it. i know some people say that things could cloud your judgement.. but instinct is not in your brain. it's in your gut.. and THAT can't be clouded. (please dont' reply to me saying .. "your brain controls your gut.. blah blah blah"... stick with my metaphor)
it's a natural tendency to defend ourselves.. ... your body knows best.
i say.. follow your instincts... dont' be fools
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